| college |
[Jul. 23rd, 2006|02:45 am] |
| [ | where'd you go? |
| | home | ] |
| [ | feel me inside |
| |  confused | ] |
| [ | beat my drum |
| | jack's mannequin | ] |
(+,-)So I had my orientation at UIC a couple days ago. All in all pretty good, the group I was with had awesome people. We all got along. Some of us are even facebooked and myspaced haha. The only bad things were probably 'club inferno' haha, but all jokes aside: the AWFUL rain on the first day which I think I'm sick from now and the fact that they fucked up my act and ap scores so I couldn't really sign up for the classes I'm supposed to take. ugh. but yeah the people were cool and the campus isn't as bad as it looks, it could use some flowers haha. Even though I still plan on transferring after like sophomore year I'm just excited about college in general. I hope to God I only have to commute for one week or not at all and that I get taken off the waitlist and into an actual dorm, it'd be so much better. that or I'll have to rent an apartment. I'm sooo excited because today I was looking at classes to drop and add and somehow a Spanish 110/103 class opened up i CAN take ESPANOL! i was so excited. so far the only classes i have for definite now is my psych and spanish class. i'm gonna add either english or math to that, most likely english. and some religious studies or genders class to fill up more credits.
(+)Well now I'm back home until Wednesday-Saturday..that's when I leave to Milwaukke for a 2 day stay with alessa and kristin to see DASHBOARD! and saturday is hot import night, ohhh boy. i'm excited and nervous for that one lol.
(-)I just don't know who to trust or who is truly loyal anymore. I feel like I've been crushed and disappointed yet I keep trying. I just want it to be the same again but I don't know what's changed. I think both of us are just going through tough times but still.
(+) shopping for laptops and dorm stuff like blankies tomorrow, yay hehe
(+) being with paul
(-) paul going away for college |
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| there's no more trying to make it right//there's no more trying tonight |
[Jul. 3rd, 2006|01:48 am] |
| [ | feel me inside |
| |  blah | ] |
| [ | beat my drum |
| | Early November : Sunday Drive | ] |
Call it an overreaction.
Call me a hypocrite [mostly for posting this up on an web-based journal] but since i'm so lost why not turn here.
Call me everything but a waste of a friend.
There's very few things I value in myself.
One of the rare things I do is my ability to try with every ounce of effort to put my friends in front of me.
I have always tried to be selfless and help my friends.
From the big things to the small things.
Granted all of this is partially my fault/
I work too much.
I have very bad time-management habits/
and very good at being late.
But yes, it would be nice to get a call to hang out
from someone other than one person
in an entire group of 'friends'.
I don't like feeling like an outsider.
I don't like feeling like I can't truly talk to you guys anymore
because no one's really listening to me.
I don't like feeling left out all the time.
I don't like feeling silence because no one talks while I'm there.
[I don't need to be the center of attention. Hell no.
Just part of the good times of my 'friends'.]
I like hanging out and branching out to other friends
but truth be told, you guys are my first choice.
Just sometimes I can't call or can't hang out
because I don't feel wanted or the plans were made without me
and I'm just a fish getting hooked onto the line.
Maybe I am a bit melodramatic
but this summer means a lot to me.
And yes, I am glad to be there for my friends.
I try to be .selfless.
and put the problems of the ones I love
before mine.
And yes, I try to hide my problems
maybe give a hint or two about
what's really wrong but I don't like talking about my problems
and I'm not asking for anyone to hold my hand
and hang on every word of my problems.
Just knwo that this summer means a lot to me.
(a) I'm an only child about to go to college. Only child. That's enough stress there.
(b) I don't know where I'll be come late august and more than that, I know for a FACT things
are going to change no matter where I am so yes, this summer means a lot to me.
(c) my phn is worse more than ever and i need to do stuff to make me happy to make the pain stop
(d)...there's more..but like i said, i dont' like spilling my guts let alone to an online journal
I don't speak about my emotions or problems for fear of being hurt
but I am hurt I am hurt
I let my emotions unravel on their own
this feeling of loneliness
and unappreciation.
Is it me that doesn't appreciate
Is it me that's wrong
All I know right now is lonely.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
[some things just end too quickly, its a story of cherishing what you have]
If tears could build a stairway
And memories a lane
I'd walk right up to heaven
And bring you back again
R.I.P. Louie Limberopolous 10.13.87 - 07.04.01
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| summer love |
[Jun. 28th, 2006|11:25 am] |
| [ | where'd you go? |
| | mi casa | ] |
| [ | beat my drum |
| | Oasis : Wonderwall | ] |
<3 |
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|
| SUMMER SKIN |
[Jun. 26th, 2006|01:48 pm] |
| [ | feel me inside |
| |  calm | ] |
| [ | beat my drum |
| | Dashboard Confessional..NEW CD BITCH :) | ] |
summer to do list:
-311 concert tickets
-improv comedy club night
-girl's night out
-lots of 6 flags
-date night with people
-baseball game in chicago, cubs or sox, don't matter
-taste of chicago
-bbq
-bonfires
-carnival
-partyyyy
-figure out all my uic and college shit
-poker poker poker
-"movie at a park" in chicago
-beach!
-host a party
-new york
-road tripsss
-bowling
-dashboard concert!
-golf or minigolf
...THE LIST IS A CONTINUING LIST... |
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| guess what? |
[Jun. 26th, 2006|01:33 pm] |
YUP! summer before college and i'm back lj-ing it up!
forget all the old entries, i don't want to delete them but i also don't know how to get them off the page, sorry! |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 6th, 2005|11:30 am] |
| [ | feel me inside |
| | hopeful | ] |
Come up with three questions for me, it can be as explicit and as private as you want, and I will answer them for you <3 |
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| thinking chair |
[Feb. 28th, 2005|08:57 pm] |
Today was alright. I'm doing alright actually :)
School wasn't bad. I actually did all my homework and finished it so that was a plus. I've decided to keep myself busy at all times so doing homework was good! Jon came over for a bit, we played cards. Now it's time to take a shower and think and fall asleep! |
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|
| (no subject) |
[Feb. 26th, 2005|01:47 am] |
| [ | feel me inside |
| |  crushed | ] |
i think perion taught me something in the five minutes we just talked. now i have heard everything. :) |
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|
| omina reniscit amor |
[Feb. 26th, 2005|12:30 am] |
| [ | feel me inside |
| |  frustrated | ] |
| [ | beat my drum |
| | Family Guy in the background | ] |
Today was a not-so-good day. I was stressed out all day at school because I tried to procrastinate and got really stressed out about it because I had to start and finish the paper and prepare my presentation for the same class. Oh well, at least it's over. Work sucked. I'll leavae it at that. I do not like working three days at a row and I do NOT NOT like being yelled at by drunken people the whole night. I tried to stay positive today though as Pat noticed, calling me Smiles the whole day, ahh what a nice kid. Corin and Perion came over for like two seconds to see Tim's speakers haha. I went to Kayla's for a bit before work and while I was leaving, I heard "You've lost that lovin feeling" on radio for the first time ever, I was kind of excited. After work, I went to see Cursed. Worst movie ever, honestly. Well that's a summary of today I guess. Oh, I also stopped by to see Julie after the movie to talk about her and Will and other things. Times like that make me wish I had a little sister, then I get over it. hehe. Yahhhh I'm gonna go now..waste of an entry..sorry! |
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| tears behind the smiles |
[Feb. 19th, 2005|12:16 am] |
| [ | feel me inside |
| | crushed | ] |
| [ | beat my drum |
| | Korn and Ice Cube : Fuck Dying | ] |
+went to FA with Gary===i really need shoes from there cuz some are on sale hehe
+went to the Basketball game, that was kool
+went to Starbucks with Jeffrey ((played cards lol)), crazy amounts of people there==weird freshmen boys staring at us
...i'm going to talk to you with a smile on my face always and you won't hear a hint of sadness in my voice and i'll make it known that you can count on me when you're having girl problems...just don't ask me about the tears before i go to sleep... |
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| update every 5 after the hour |
[Feb. 16th, 2005|08:48 pm] |
| [ | feel me inside |
| | pretty good | ] |
| [ | beat my drum |
| | Afternoon Delight | ] |
- jon ollied over me tonight and it was an unsuspecting adrenaline rush!..well for that short amount of time at least lol
- got my data match sheets today. some note-worthy things are: jenna being my #1 on the best friends list; pauly being my #2 match; justin and perion making my lists..hah
- field trip tomorrow, should be better than staying in school all day so hope that goes pretty good cuz i have work after wards so i dont want to feel like my day was a waste
- mom's being bitchy and very very commanding tonight, almost Hitler-like; can you say "argh"?
..well I had a spare minute so that was my update..hope you enjoyed it!...please comment <3
*Camille* |
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